Hinges, Pride, and Disillusionment


I remember the talk President Gordon B. Hinckley gave, in the April 1984 General Conference closing address. He speaks of hinges. Gate hinges are typically a small mechanism that holds a gate in place. It doesn’t need to be very big to do its job. But its simple job allows a gate to open wide.

Small, seemingly insignificant events can open the gate for much larger events for good or bad. Often, when the gate is left wide open, pride and disillusionment enter in unchecked. In this case, Pres. Hinckley relates the story of Thomas B. Marsh and the episode of his wife’s milk bargain with a neighbor.

The wives had agreed to share their milk to make cheese. Sis. Marsh held back the cream which was included in the agreement. Instead of admitting this small omission and humbly apologizing for it, Thomas (then president of the Quorum of the Twelve) presented and argued the case to several local leaders, and even to the First Presidency. Each one said he and his wife were wrong and should apologize. In retaliation and hurt pride, he went to the magistrate in Missouri and said the “Mormons” were hostile. This is what led to the extermination order that took place in the winter and was so devastating to our Saints.

All of us have experienced small things that balloon into something so much bigger. In this case, the effects were terrible for the Marshes (they left the church) and horrible for others (innocent people becoming victims).

Many years later, Thomas asked to return to membership in the church. George A Smith recorded Thomas’ return.

“He lost his testimony of the gospel. For nineteen years he walked in poverty and darkness and bitterness, experiencing illness, and loneliness. He grew old before his time. Finally, like the prodigal son in the parable of the Savior, he recognized his foolishness and painfully made his way to this valley, and asked Brigham Young to forgive him and permit his rebaptism into the Church.”

With so many changes happening in our church and the church allowing complete transparency on several issues in question, people are talking about a great sifting that is occurring with the membership of the church. While the church opens its gate in full disclosure, we, as members, shouldn’t be grabbing the handle and flinging the gate wide open for our own unholy purposes.

Members, who hold such promise, are leaving the church over small things that they have made big. They have put their membership at stake to prove something of little worth. Pres. Hinckley says,

“It is so easy to stumble. It is sometimes so hard to keep our voices low when small things provoke us.”

At what cost do we let our pride show? What purpose do we gain by standing on our false sense of righteousness?

Our prophets remind us to watch our pride, for this is what destroyed the Nephites. They urge us to walk in humility. At each conference, we hear how the church is doing and we hear how membership continues to grow. And we are reminded to check ourselves that small digressions don’t grow into monumental chasms. Pride always causes disillusionment.

It is so hard to cross back over to safe ground. Let pride go. Don’t feed your disillusionment. Instead, trust in your faith. Trust the words of the prophet. Hold on to what you know. Feed your testimony daily.