{"id":11062,"date":"2019-12-05T08:00:57","date_gmt":"2019-12-05T14:00:57","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.reliefsocietywomen.com\/blog\/?p=11062"},"modified":"2019-12-04T12:50:12","modified_gmt":"2019-12-04T18:50:12","slug":"motherhood-distinct-and-different-in-happy-ways","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.reliefsocietywomen.com\/blog\/2019\/12\/05\/motherhood-distinct-and-different-in-happy-ways\/","title":{"rendered":"Motherhood: Distinct and Different-In Happy Ways"},"content":{"rendered":"

Is it really true? Is Relief Society the last place on earth a girl can learn how to be a mother? Perhaps, there are other organizations out there, but it\u2019s likely our church is the last and only place motherhood is praised. In fact, our church offers so many tools to help mothers be distinct and different\u2014in happy ways\u2014from the women of the world.<\/span><\/p>\n

Stephen L. Richards (of the First Presidency) spoke to the Relief Society<\/a> sisters back in 1951. Already, women were looking outside of the home for fulfillment, so he spoke about motherhood.<\/span><\/p>\n

Using his own mother as an example, he said, \u201cFor the first quarter-century of her married life, she gave herself to her home and her children.\u201d Then he shared his personal feelings.<\/span><\/p>\n

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\u201cI wish that the women of the world could understand what it means to secure such happiness out of their homes.\u201d<\/span><\/em><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

This sounds like what Pres. Kimball said<\/a> in 1979: \u201cThat the women of the Church are seen as distinct and different\u2014in happy ways\u2014from the women of the world.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

Have you ever met a happy housewife? Or a happy Latter-day Saint housewife? There are still many stay-at-home moms, but most of the ones I\u2019ve met are exhausted; quietly brooding; or just coming back from exercising, lunch with friends, or a part-time job. Motherhood skills are neither taught anywhere nor rewarded openly.<\/span><\/p>\n

Pres. Richards offers some profound advice that is still important today.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\u201cProvoke the Elders to Good Works\u201d<\/span><\/h2>\n

In the early days of Relief Society, Joseph Smith<\/a> taught the women \u201cby your good example provoke the Elders to good works.\u201d This seems somewhat \u201cloaded\u201d to me. That might get out of hand real fast. In fact, Pres. Richards tells the women that his wife \u201calways uses it on me if I think she goes too far. She says she has official warrant to provoke me.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

The responsible meaning behind Joseph Smith\u2019s counsel is that sisters need to help their husbands, who are holders of the Priesthood. That includes encouraging our men to attend all of their priesthood meetings and fulfill their callings well. Complete respect, without belittling them in front of the children is essential. Today, that\u2019s almost a popular thing to do; to emasculate the men around us. No, by provoking them, we are really reminding them who they really are, and inviting them to fulfill their priesthood responsibility.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Marriage is a Partnership<\/span><\/h2>\n

Often, one or the other parent will be the one who manages everything in the home: finances, children, maintenance, etc. That often falls on the wife, but not always. Sometimes, the wife is given no control over anything. When a marriage is a true partnership there is a lot more discussion, sharing, appreciation, and love in the home.<\/span><\/p>\n

When children see both father and mother working side-by-side, respecting one another, and sharing family life, the spirit is more inclined to stay awhile.<\/span><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

What Makes Latter-day Saint Homes Different?<\/span><\/h2>\n

Or maybe a better question is, \u201cAre Latter-day Saint Homes Different?\u201d The only way we can be different is if we practice what we\u2019ve been given and help others along the way. Pres. Richards suggests using the scriptures to help our homes run more smoothly. The scriptures, if studied carefully, will make us better people, there is no doubt. In the scriptures, we can be reminded of how best to handle temptation. We can learn about patience, forgiveness, repentance; attributes that will not only help our marriages and families but help us become more Christ-like.<\/span><\/p>\n

The role of Visiting Teachers was brought up in his talk. He suggests that these teachers might perform a \u201cdiscreet investigation\u201d of family relationships. How would that go over during our Ministering visits today? Without getting too personal, are we willing to share lessons learned or study scriptures or marriage books together? Where else can we be taught about marriage and motherhood? The world doesn\u2019t seem to care anymore.<\/span><\/p>\n

I found this talk to be very insightful and relevant to our day. We need strong marriages, strong parents, and strong families more than ever before. The world won\u2019t teach us how to find happiness in our homes, but our church has provided staggering amounts of advice, ideas, and spiritual guidance to help us along the way. We have all the tools necessary to make our homes different\u2014in happy ways.<\/span><\/p>\n