I ran across a talk, given by Chieko Okazaki, called Healing From Sexual Abuse. This talk was given way back in 1992, taped and sold by Deseret Book, and given again at a BYU Conference in 2002. I think her talk is important for us to know and understand.<\/p>\n
She gives eight strong messages:<\/p>\n
1. \u201cSexual abuse is a problem for all of us, both men and women, whether we have experienced it personally or not.\u201d Her message is that we either are someone, or know someone who has been abused.
\n2. \u201cSexual abuse is not the child\u2019s fault.\u201d She quotes a friend, who was a victim, with these words. \u201cI often find myself wondering why we, knowing our parents are abusers, continue to protect them by idealizing them.\u201d
\n3. Those abused \u201cprobably need professional help and certainly need personal support.\u201d Friends don\u2019t need to become therapists, but they are invaluable when it comes to holding hands, accompanying, and just loving.
\n4. \u201cWomen and men who are coming to terms with sexual abuse need all the spiritual help they can get.\u201d Pray for them, encourage them to seek priesthood blessings, talk to them of hope.
\n5. \u201cTeachers and leaders have a special role.\u201d Be aware of the stories you tell and how they may be interpreted. Abusive authority figures can be very confusing to children; teachers and leaders can offer escape, or corner the child unknowingly.
\n6. \u201cHealing from sexual abuse is a very long and very painful process.\u201d Most victims have to dig out suppressed memories, and then deal with them.
\n7. This one involves the perpetrators. \u201cWhen the abuse is incest, that means that a wife and a mother either does not know or chooses not to know what her husband is doing to their child.\u201d
\n8. \u201cWe can do much to stop the abuse before it starts by holding the men and women in our lives to gospel standards. We can refuse to accept rationalizations and twisted logic.\u201d<\/p>\n
This talk was full of sensitive, loving comfort. She admits to never having to deal with this problem in her life; but the words she uses are full of understanding, acceptance, and support of the victim.<\/p>\n
As sisters, we MUST put aside our judgments. There are people who need our nurturing, our love, and our help. May we reach out to one another, and especially to children, who need to be rescued, lifted up, and reminded of our hope in Christ.<\/p>\n