As human beings, with similar feelings, we are a worldwide sisterhood. We can all work at reaching out more to one another.
How do you really treat someone who is different?
At BYU’s Women’s Conference, Sis. Terri Packer shared some interesting experiences that should make us look at ourselves more critically, and carefully.
After twisting her foot, she attended a Relief Society Conference with an ace bandage and a cane. She was shocked to feel that people gave her a wide berth and seemed to look through her, not at her. She was even more shocked to realize she was guilty of doing the same to others.
Do we smile friendly, or smile pityingly? Do we talk to the person pushing the wheelchair, or bend over and address the person in the wheelchair? Do we help those who could use a hand, or rush
passed quickly?
Sis. Packer said, “If we look at everyone else’s differences, we will never connect with one another. If we let fear control us, we will limit our blessings and opportunities.”
All people are interesting. All people have a life story. All people are children of God, which makes them lovable. And of course, because we are all children, we have an instant connection the world over.
I have an interesting perspective about the world. My parents were born in France and Mexico. People tell me my parents have thick accents, but I never really notice it. I did hear my grandmothers’ thick accents, and still today marvel at an older woman who speaks clear English. (I guess for a while I thought all old people were difficult to understand.) We traveled quite a bit, all over the world, when I was a child. I thought it was normal to run into someone you knew in any ward anywhere because everyone seemed to know my dad. We had instant friends everywhere we went, and even today, whether I find someone I know or not, I expect to find friends everywhere.
Sis. Packer offered some suggestions to bring the world closer to you:
• Get rid of all the barriers, fears, and prejudices
• Study and learn about other cultures
• Serve others, get to know their handicaps (both external and internal, because we all have them)
• Find the common in others
• Smile at everyone
• Ask Heavenly Father to prompt you, give you opportunities to stretch yourself over boundaries; then act on these promptings
• Don’t let anyone around you feel ignored
Years ago, I was given a calling to entertain an autistic boy during the Sunday School hour of Church. He was adult size, and big, but couldn’t sit still that long in a regular class. I remember his mother sharing her concerns for him when she and her husband would eventually die. “What will happen to him?” Sometimes there are no easy answers, but I was grateful for the little help I could offer. He really was fun to spend time with. He knew who Jesus was, he loved taking walks around the chapel building, and even though I would never have been able to control him, if he ever lost control and I never really made eye contact with him, I was happy to give his mother a break she sorely needed. The spirit surrounded that sweet soul and was there every time I was with him.
One thing about women is we like to gravitate toward those who are most like us. Instead of judging the outer layer of people, we, as Women of God, know enough to reach inward and accept the person inside. This is where we will find that we are all really very much alike. Many of our problems are similar. Our likes and dislikes are very human. Our shortcomings are natural. Our weaknesses are often thankfully the same. (Oh, come on, you know you feel validated when you see others struggling with the same things you struggle with.) As we recognize ourselves in other people, we will learn that by helping them, we are helping ourselves. We need each other. And together we can rise above the failings of the world.
One final story told by Sis. Packer: A group of international sisters, in a University setting, gathered together to read their scriptures each day. As they sat in a circle, they took turns reading a verse or two in their own languages. I can’t express to you how that touches me. When we invite the spirit and act as His messengers, we will find it easy to connect as a worldwide sisterhood. We will understand one another enough, and the blessings of our association will flow around us.
Just wanted to add a comment. I was in the class Terri taught because she’s a friend. Sat next to a wonderful “new friend” who said something profound. I think we could all relate — she said that, underneath it all, when we peel back the layers, we’re all the same: daughters of Divinity who want to love, be loved, and understood. I think it’s true. Have we ever “put on a face” so that we can avoid being bruised? Sometimes, it’s that very “face” that does the bruising to others — even tho it’s not meant to. Maybe what we need is to understand the message and get rid of the layers, or “faces.” Just BE that daughter of Divinity.
So true! We forget that we are one family. I may get in trouble for this, but Utah Mormons have a way of singling themselves out as the exception. Everywhere else in the world there is a sense of family, belonging, and sincerity among one another (Generally speaking). People just want to be loved. Utah Mormons may live in the heart of the Church, but because of that very reason, they need to reach out all the more as fellow examples. A Daughter of Divinity will be the most humble of servants, with one face, and no exceptions. Thank you for your comment.
Oh, yes, you ARE in trouble for that! I am a Utah Mormon, born and raised a non-Mormon in the heart of Salt Lake City. I joined the Church partially because of the love and family oriented ward in whose boundaries I lived. I stenched of cigarettes my whole life living at home, my dad being a pack a day smoker, the odor of which I wasn’t aware because when one lives with it one never realizes how they really smell. My parents were very anti-Mormon and didn’t mind letting everyone know, often speaking unkindly to the Home Teachers who tried to fellowship them. Yet ward members embraced me in spite of my background. My husband is a convert as well. We have only had the Utah wards we have lived in as our family for support in our beliefs and ordinations, sorrows, happy occasions and all other faith related experiences. We couldn’t have felt more loved if we lived out in the “mission field,” which, by the way we did, as well. We personally find Mormons to be the same everywhere: there are always people who judge, keep to themselves, don’t feel they fit in, or are wary of those who try to do their best, worldwide. To generalize that Utah Mormons don’t live by the same principles or try to love and include others is a dangerous and slippery slope to embark upon. I doubt that you know all of the Mormons in Utah, or have met very many. It is one of the most faithful areas of the Church, with the highest rate of baptisms in the English speaking missions. Wards and stakes are continually dividing and new meetinghouses going up. Someone must be helping those missionaries somehow! I feel badly for those who have a preconceived impression of “Utah Mormons.” Living up to the Church’s tenets and proclamations is a true test of faithfulness here, where there is so much scrutiny, criticism public condemnation, and encouragement and taunting from fellow Mormons who have fallen away to take the same path. Many converts whom I have met who moved to Utah with fear and trepidation because of what they had been told about “those Mormons in Utah” have refuted everything they were told. Conversely,they have expressed testimony of the sincere love, caring and inclusion that enveloped them as they began to regularly attend and feel at home. If you are truly a Daughter of Divinity, the suggestion is that you re-examine your judgment of Utah Mormons.
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